Ex- English captain Lewis Moody has announced he has been found to have motor neurone disease and stated he cannot yet deal with the full consequences of the muscle-wasting condition that took the lives of other rugby players Doddie Weir and Rob Burrow.
The 47-year-old, who was part of the 2003 championship side and won multiple English and European titles with Leicester, appeared on BBC Breakfast 14 days after finding out he has the condition.
"There's an element of facing the future and not wanting to really process that at the present time," he stated.
"This doesn't mean I don't understand where it's heading. We understand that. But there is definitely a hesitation to look the future in the face for now."
Moody, speaking with his wife Annie, states instead he feels "calm" as he concentrates on his present welfare, his family and getting ready for when the illness progresses.
"Maybe that's trauma or possibly I handle situations uniquely, and when I have the information, it's more manageable," he added.
Early Signs
Moody found out he had MND after detecting some weakness in his upper arm while working out in the gym.
After physical therapy failed to improve the condition, a number of scans indicated neural pathways in his central nervous system had been affected by MND.
"You receive this condition identification of MND and we're understandably very emotional about it, but it's quite odd because I think nothing's wrong," he added.
"I don't sense unwell. I don't experience poorly
"My indications are rather minimal. I have a bit of muscle deterioration in the fingers and the upper arm.
"I continue to be competent to performing anything and everything. And hopefully that will persist for as long as is feasible."
Illness Advancement
MND can progress rapidly.
According to the non-profit MND Association, the illness claims a one-third of people within a twelve months and above half within two years of identification, as swallowing and inhalation become more difficult.
Medical care can only slow decline.
"It's not me that I feel sad for," commented an moved Moody.
"It's about the sadness around having to tell my mum - as an only child - and the ramifications that has for her."
Household Effect
Talking from the family home with his wife and their pet dog by his side, Moody was overcome with emotion when he mentioned breaking the news to his sons - 17-year-old Dylan and 15-year Ethan - the devastating news, commenting: "That represented the toughest thing I've ever had to do."
"They are two brilliant boys and that was pretty upsetting," Moody stated.
"We were seated on the couch in weeping, Ethan and Dylan both embraced in each other, then the dog jumped over and started removing the moisture off our faces, which was rather funny."
Moody explained the priority was remaining in the now.
"We have no treatment and that is why you have to be extremely militantly focused on just accepting and savoring everything now," he said.
"As my wife mentioned, we've been truly lucky that the primary decision I made when I left playing was to devote as much period with the kids as attainable. We can't reclaim those periods back."
Player Connection
Professional competitors are disproportionately influenced by MND, with investigations indicating the incidence of the condition is up to 600% greater than in the general population.
It is believed that by restricting the O2 available and causing damage to neural pathways, consistent, strenuous training can initiate the illness in those inherently predisposed.
Athletic Playing Days
Moody, who earned 71 England appearances and competed with the British and Irish Lions in New Zealand in 2005, was nicknamed 'Mad Dog' during his playing career, in recognition of his courageous, unwavering approach to the game.
He competed through a stress fracture of his leg for a duration with Leicester and once caused a training-ground scuffle with team-mate and friend Martin Johnson when, frustrated, he left a tackle pad and began throwing himself into physical contacts.
After appearing as a substitute in the Rugby World Cup championship win over Australia in 2003, he claimed a ball at the rear of the line-out in the critical phase of play, setting a foundation for playmaker Matt Dawson to advance and Jonny Wilkinson to score the game-deciding drop kick.
Backing Community
Moody has earlier told Johnson, who captained England to that championship, and a few other former players about his medical situation, but the others will be discovering his news with the remainder of public.
"There shall be a period when we'll need to rely on their backing but, at the present, just having that type of affection and recognition that people are there is all that matters," he said.
"This game is such a great group.
"I told to the kids the other day, I've had an extraordinary life.
"Even if it finished now, I've valued all of it and welcomed all of it and got to do it with unbelievable people.
"When you get to call your enthusiasm your vocation, it's one of the most significant blessings.
"Achieving this for so considerable a period with the teams that I did it with was a delight. And I understand they will want to help in every way they can and I anticipate having those talks."
